Critics quoted in a Contra Costa Times watchdog column attacked “UC Berkeley’s best-kept secret,” on Sunday, and perhaps for valid reasons. In light of budget cuts, how can our fair university afford to keep a research station in the South Pacific?

You can argue that UC Berkeley affiliates travel to the Richard B. Gump Research Station on the island of Moorea for the love of science. Unfortunately, what may start out as a legitimate research destination always ends up abused by cheap, wanderlusting yuppie students who like nice university subsidies on their globe-trotting lifestyles.

Wawel Castle in 2007

That’s completely false!

I can solemnly swear that I am traveling to Krakow, Poland, entirely to pursue scientific research and scientific research alone. It has absolutely nothing to do with visiting such historical places as Jagiellonian University (Collegium Maius, in particular) and the nearby Auschwitz, or enjoying international cuisine and learning more Polish language and culture, which, in so far as science is concerned, is inconsequential, or wandering around in the historic old city.

Oh, and did I mention that there is this castle, Wawel, about 20 minutes’ walk away from the old city center that looks as if it just popped out of a fairy tale? (see right)

in any case, I solemnly swear that my visit to Poland has absolutely nothing to do with these tangential activities, and, oh, getting the University (through an NSF grant, I think) to pay for my plane ticket.